Chapter Thirty-Four, Cont'd. Sleigh Bobs Rang! December 2008, Part Two by Amy Bob GET YOUR MONKEY OFF MY TOP 25 LIST!!!

Thursday 12/11/08 - SPACE is the Place

I can’t believe I AM downstairs at 5:45am. In the van to rainy Logan, we are all barely awake as Revere starts its morning twinkles. I think about Berklee students asleep in their dorms or apartments, me 20 years ago. The flight is fine save for a bumpy up and down, and I watch The West Wing on Bravo all the way to O’Hare, secretly hoping Obama’s administration resembles Josiah Bartlet's somehow. I fall asleep briefly before being blinded by the bright white blanket of the midwest.

SuperDan Falato (Harry’s oldest friend) picks us up curbside. I think Dan must have lost a bet - he is ALSO going to shuttle us to Midway tomorrow morning! Longtime Chicagoan Dan is all over the breaking Rod Blagojevich news and is chock full of stories that lead to one conclusion: “Blagojevich was always a douchebag.” New Orleans-based jazz pianist David Torkanowksy, (with whom I sang in Harry Shearer's CD release show last summer) is aboard too, for the Holiday SingAlong tonight in Evanston. David observes, classically, that “anyone who’s ever done a drug deal knows you don’t talk on your own phone.” Judith Owen meets us in the hotel lobby in a huge "black marshmallow" coat to make sure our early checkin is in order (THANK YOU, JUDITH!!!), and I print our boarding passes for TOMORROW (!) before heading upstairs.

Matthew, Richard and I grab breakfast at the Golden Olympic diner downtown. Matthew orders the "garbage omelet" - to stave off the cold he's developing... trash never smelled so good! When we return to the hotel, Harry is in lobby wearing basically the same coat as Judith, only shorter. They must look quite goofy side by side... My 3-hour nap in the sun streaming through my window yields better sleep than any I have gotten this week. Go figure!

SPACE is amazing - a former auto showroom gutted and reconfigured as a restaurant up front and performance space in the back. Judith tells me “you will cry with joy” as she leads us backstage to a platter of fruit and... gourmet CHEESES! We lounge, soundcheck, yak and dine for a few hours. David is probably sorry he confessed to being recently mistaken for Ron Jeremy at an airport security checkpoint as the ribbing is endless, but he is so obsessed with the Bears/Saints game (sorry, DT!) he hardly hears us carrying on about it. Later he'll amaze us with his antler-clad ivory-grooving... Harry signs the book I brought for Chris Biondo.

In the show, Judith and Harry sing together and individually (Harry's "How About a Bailout for Santa?" as a highlight, as well as their "Christmas With The Devil" duet) and Jim Peterik performs two of his hits, "Vehicle" and "Eye of the Tiger." Judith does an amazing cover of the Survivor tune on her breathtaking CD called - and clickable! - HERE. Harry insists we do OUR version of "Jesus was a Dreidel Spinner," which I targeted for us when we did this show with them and Jill Sobule last year, so he counter-cantors at the beginning with Richard Bob. The audience is pumped, and our two 3-song sets are super fun, save for what Dan dubs the "boner killer" - Pederik apparently (and unknowingly) unplugged the power for the effects pedal we use in "White Room." It STILL rocks - but I'd be lying if I said it doesn't suck when that effect doesn't happen. I can sing it, sure, and overcommitting knocks it over the top, but the distortion effect knocks the ROOF off... Might as well face it, we're addicted to technology. During the singalong part of the evening, Harry injects Mr. Burns into "Rudolph" and brings the house down. Judith is stunning as always.

My cousins Lorie and Julie are here, plus Lorie's hubby Nate, a big Bobs fan. Lorie comes backstage with me at intermission and yaks with Judith about London... Bobs fans in the audience make themselves known to us after the show, some saying they had no idea the band was still around. (If anyone knows how we could solve that, let us know!) We wanna come back to SPACE. Dan shuttles me back to hotel since The Bobs took off before me (but called to let me know they forgot to count and take the merchandise with them, natch). I repack again, talking to Alex on the speakerphone. A nearby train whizzes by every 15 minutes. I do get to sleep around 1:00 a.m. and dream of eating cheese with Judith as Harry plays bass.

Friday 12/12/08 - Midway Home

I can’t believe I am downstairs at 5:45 am. Dan vrooms us to Midway in the dark. Whatta guy. Dan also knows all the local talk radio hosts, having been in that business as a producer, host, you-name-it for many years. We pass the Congress Hotel, its red neon a pre-dawn beacon. The sunrise yields to completely clear skies, 20 degrees. I wonder where my Chicago pals on Facebook are right now (probably asleep). Matthew, now in the throes of a head cold, smiles when I give him the intricately designed Kamasutra chocolates from Dan Falato's wife (who makes them commericially). The "Rhapsody in Bob" CD we hand Dan curbside will HARDLY express our thanks for his help. Midway seems much nicer than last time I was here - they DID do some work on it. I snag the first seat on the Southwest plane - the front row. The cheery SW ground dude is wearing shorts. Wow. Bye-yee.

I get to go home… and shower… and squeeze da boo… so as Alex drives me away from the terminal, Dan gives me the finger from the Budget shuttle @ LAX as the three dudes go get their rental car! At home I DO squeeze The Boo, throw in laundry, and grab a bite at Souplantation with Alex as the heaviness gathers in the front of my head... I so need a nap. I'm also a bit stressed since we have a houseguest, my pal Whitney from Chicago (see the February 2006 Bobtale, Midwestward, Ho!), staying with us on a recon mission of sorts before moving to Los Angeles next month. Whit's a fine guest, but I should have considered my own needs for sanctuary during the less than 36 hours I will pass through my home... I sleep for about 2 hours… and successfully resist doing more at home than I should.

Traffic to Torrance… we are sold out. It's a mainly older, conservative crowd (so we adjust the set accordingly), but strangely enough, younger folks from a chorale that's rehearsing in another part of the venue tonight start coming over to buy our CDs at intermission! Matthew is sick, so the set is also adjusted to give him some breaks... the level of the "White Room" effect pedal has also been messed with - that's two times in a row... I hates that! Uber-fan Ilayne Lucas gushes to us in the lobby afterwards. She's so great. And in what seems to be a developing pattern, someone comes to the merch table to tell me about another bagel place to try in Los Angeles! I knew that Tom Spath would get a reaction, but I didn't expect this to happen at almost every New York and L.A. show!

Alex tells me on the way home that he liked the Dreidel arrangement. Our SECOND houseguest of the night arrives around 11:00 p.m., my pal Mark Somers, up from San Diego for a convention - he gets the couch - we stay up yakking for a bit and then I need to collapse upstairs. Sitka sleeps on us… and it just doesn't compute that I am leaving AGAIN tomorrow. "No, Mommy, I will sleep on you! No going!"

Saturday 12/13/08 - Home Short Home

I wake up a lot during the night not knowing where the hell I am. Totally discombobulated. This sometimes happens when I come home from a long tour. Mark leaves @ 8am. I make coffee, snuggle up in the livingroom and watch the first episode of DEXTER that I missed on 11/30, do emails, go through 2 weeks of mail, and play with Sitka. Bagel Nosh with Alex even feels weird - this is an Amy Is Home For A While Thing and here we are, acting like I actually AM home for a while... the clock is ticking. I nap, re-pack (OMFG), watch the second DEXTER I missed on 12/7...

Long Beach Airport rocks as always - free wifi and no security wait. Richard meets me there (Dan and Matthew left at 7:00 A.M., the fools) and gives me the Digital Real Book. This is no small thang. Most musicians all have or covet what is called the REAL BOOK - a great collection of standard and jazz charts known for many years as THE resource book. This new digital edition enables you to not only access a chart immediately but to TRANSPOSE it. Quite a find.

We land in Seattle amid what will be the first of several Major Snowstorms. It's gorgeous and quiet - at this moment there is no sign of the coming crippling of the city and the onslaught of biting cold... so I smile in the backseat of Nell's car. I try to be quiet entering Fran Stull’s apartment, but Brutus growls… aw, you know me, honey!

Sunday 12/14/08 - SSSSSSSSeattle

Everyone’s up early… so so am I. It's a Winter Wonderland. Duncan misses the "Jingle Bell Run," but I'm not so sure it was cancelled since I see folks at my regular Green Lake morning hang, Zoka, wearing JINGLE BELL RUN T-shirts as they snarf their coffee and quiches. It's hard to determine what will happen here, where school is cancelled for several days BEFORE the weather gets bad. (They are very scaredy, if you ask me...) I grab the bus to down to Hale’s Brewery, the erstwhile home of the Moisture Festival, to catch an afternoon matinee of the Fremont Players' British Panto production of CINDERELLA. I've written some of the music for this fun children's show, which premiered this summer at the Oregon Country Fair (where we Bobs were so busy with shows I didn't get a chance to see the whole thing! But if you click on that link you might still get to see a picture of us performing on the Mainstage a few years ago). What truly cracks me up is not my own work, but the "ghost scene," a standard in British panto that is simultanaeously Stoopid and Hysterical. Hearing kids laugh/scream, "Look behind you!" as a goofy guy in a sheet menaces the bumbling folks in the woods gets me every time. The production photo on the left was taken by amazing Seattle photographer John Cornicello. Check out his work here.

Afterwards, I grab dinner with the musical director, Stuart and his friend Heather @ the yummy Latona Pub. When the subject of classical music comes up, Stuart tells me one of his favorite pieces is Faure's Cantique de Jean Racine. I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED THIS PIECE!!!! We talk about how much fun it is (and how much work) to do classical pieces. I sang in the Los Angeles Bach Festival this fall and it was incredible. The Mass in B Minor gave me the best musical ass-kicking I have been paid to endure and love in a long time.

Monday 12/15/08 - SSSSSSSSold out!

SLEEP! COLD! Lazy, lazy, lazy! I finally get outside @ noon after Facebook chatting, emails, etc. to Diggity Dog and some Zoka coffee & crosswords (although I feel silly there w/o a laptop). I chill out watching CNN with Fran until Dan comes to pick us up.

At the Triple Door, the Soundcheck Follies are a welcome welcome. Godfrey Daniels’ big balls are providing a festive backdrop (come on - I couldn't have said that any other way!) for the evening, which will feature his magical act as well as breathtaking Drag Chanteuse Arnaldo doing an Eartha Kitt (RIP) holiday set. Both of them joined Harry and Judith right here LAST week (when we couldn't) in their Seattle Holiday Singalong!

We usually are given dinner at the Triple Door, which shares a kitchen with Wild Ginger, but I don't eat a lot of Asian food these days (our spectacular dinner there last year was a big exception - see my December 2007 BobTale, A Northwest Christmas Week)... so between soundcheck and the show I do my required Nordstrom Rack run (or as my pal Tim Furst calls it, "Return to the Mothership"). Then buzz the Steelhead Diner at about 6:20pm. The show starts at 7:30, so I've got about 40 minutes. Eben took me here recently and we loved it, especially the fried cheese curds from Beecher's (around the corner) - I took a picture of them with my phone! The Steelhead uses a lot of locally grown foods, most of which you can get at nearby Pike Place Market. I sit up at the counter right in front of the chefs, and after I say hello to all of them (seemed like the logical thing to do) I end up getting serious star treatment. I fess up and show them the picture of the their cheese curds on my phone, and they gift me a small portion! One of the chefs puts extra Oregonzola (one of my faves from the Rogue Creamery) on my salad ("Since you love cheese!"). I am amazed and thankful, and leave a big tip as I run out the door at 7:05...I think I left skidmarks!

IT IS A GREAT SHOW. Arnaldo, Godfrey. Sold out - packed to the rafters. On a Monday night. God, I love playing here. They may have recorded it - and I'll chase after it to get a recording of Jesus Was a Dreidel Spinner to send to Jill Sobule... Folks from the Fremont Players and CONTACT are there as well as singers from CLOCKWORK, up from the Bay Area for a week of Northwest gigs. Best quote, from someone I actually know: "It kept me awake." I head back with Matthew after packing up the merch and profusely thanking the wonderful staff (that means you, Nathan!). I dream of airports.

Freelance writer Andrew Gilbert did a great piece on us and the show in the Seattle Times. which you can read HERE.

Tuesday 12/16/08 - SSSSSSSeattle Still

It is just too cold to go out in the morning! This is totally wrong for Seatlle...but I bundle up and bus to the U district on my day off. Rachel Getting Married is pretty good - although about 20 minutes too long... I nab some great gifts at the UDub bookstore stuff for Nora & her family - hopefully I'll get to see her for 20 minutes before they leave, since our schedules don't line up well this weekend. I also buy Alex a Husky puppy calendar that even makes ME say "AW!!!" Instead of scoping out dinner I walk home (just over a mile), at which point it doesn’t feel like 28 degrees anymore. I took this cool picture on the 45th Street bridge over I-5 at sunset...

I horn in on dinner with Matthew, Fiona and Duncan later, with their neighbor Matt & his two boys, left alone for a few days as his wife Sarah does business in Brussels. We have one of the most interesting discussions ever about the choice to become a parent... I am so grateful for this thoughtful, introspective day after such a long month... but I do loves me the madness, I must admit.

Wednesday 12/17/08 - Hillsbrrrrrrrrrro

Matthew is kind of panicking about getting to Portland and I don’t know why...until I see that, in Olympia, the CAPITAL CITY of Washington State, the snow is the worst. These people apparently don't know that you have to get the plows out IMMEDIATELY or it freezes. We are completely OK until our customary Starbucks stop (the DuPont/Steilacoom exit off of I-5 South near Fort Lewis) - that's the important thing. We crawl through the two-lane, truck-troubled Nisqually area in the snow (the one that will flood horrifically in the first week of 2009) as the previously fretting Matthew FALLS ASLEEP in the backseat! Aw... The road is mainly clear after that, through Chehalis, and finally OR-26, for which no chains are needed (the radio said otherwise). I must say, Dan’s new Rav4 is syyyooouper. Oregon is slushy but not iced, which might save us in terms of audience tonight. We tell tomorrow’s promoter at Seattle Presents, a city hall noontime concert series, to call us EARLY in the morning to cancel if he has to. We want to know BEFORE we attempt to get back whether or not it's still going to happen!

Dinner @ The Venetian restaurant in Hillsboro is excellent indeed, and Sean the promoter is also. I remember him from last year. We have about ½ of a house because of the weather (sold out last year) but they are mighty! Our pal Charlie Brown opens the show with a juggling routine in which "Heh heh” plays a role (you have to see it) and brings the house down. The second go at "The Coffee Song" is better, without using the loop pedal, but oddly enough Matthew forgets the words on which we duet briefly (which Richard bugged ME to memorize). (I'm not picking on Matthew on this tour - Bobs fans know this is a hallmark of his personality. Just read THIS!)

Our friends Howard, Andrine and Petra (from the Flying Karamazov/Oregon Country Fair dynasty) say hello after the show... I meet Josh Killingsworth of Portland's A Rose and a Song, with whom I've been corresponding on Facebook, and some of his friends from cool local vocal group V-Chords. They took the train out instead of driving on the ice. TROOPERS! And several people buy my solo CD despite the fact that we forgot to promote it in our merch spiels during the show. Thanks, guys! Back at the hotel, it's too late to see this week's DEXTER...waaaah... And I have nightmares until I get the Seattle show cancellation call at 6:15 a.m..... OY...

Thursday 12/18/08 - Soaking up the Snow

We leave for Seattle @ 10am anyway and make great time. Richard tries valiantly to find us a Starbucks (go, Urban Spoon!) on the way up under alternating blue skies/rain/OKness until SEATTLE ITSELF, where we escape I-5 and start crawling up E Marginal Way. Complete morons go around State Trooper cars and jackknife, spin out, etc. all around us. These people need a course or something! Much cursing is done by Your Faithful Ohioans, Syracuse Grads, and Wyoming boys! Alex calls to tell me Sitka curled up and fell asleep in his gym bag. Brynne call to tell me some people who just signed up for our e-database notices in Seattle cancelled after 3 emails in a row. What are ya gonna do? We had to send the Welcome, Show Announcement and Happy New Year emails!

I hear there's a "Free Shipping" bonanza to be had online, so back at Matthew's place I catch up on email and surf for bargains. Eben just got back from Disneyworld of all places - he comes over in climate shock, and we hit the Afghani place for dinner ("Do we have to order rugs, Eben?") in Absolutely Wrong 18 Degree Weather. He tells me all about the "private rooms" for adults at DisneyWorld... bars and the like... I love you, Eben, but that's too Goofy!

Later that night, I get a special treat - a soak in Matthew and Fiona's outdoor hot tub. The freezing, snow-covered surroundings bring to mind many wonderful outdoor soaks I've had.. the first being on a bus & truck tour of Jesus Christ Superstar in Europe, on which the grueling schedule (rise, get on bus, drive a lot, check in, do show, eat, go to sleep, lather, rinse, repeat) got a respite. I'll never forget swimming underneath a flexible half-wall, from the indoor spa to the outdoor thermal pools in the middle of the Alps as light snow fell, sometime in December 1985. That tour sucked for many reasons, but I learned a WHOLE lot about myself, about Europe, about long runs of shows (I have no interest in doing them) and the dynamics of group tours (kindergarten), not to mention the mental snapshots I have of Austria, Switzerland, Belgium, and segments of My Wasted (and I do mean wasted) Youth that will be with me forever... I also think about Chena Hot Springs (just north of Fairbanks - The Bobs will be there in a few months!), The Blue Lagoon in Keflavik, Iceland (Put this on your Must To Do List - I SWEAR TO YOU), and several places in British Columbia. It's like Trader Joe's Peppermint Bark for the senses. After my soak, I come inside to watch the McGuigan-Stulls decorate their Christmas Tree. I guess most people get or got to do this with their own family - but I have never been present when a family did this. Not because I'm Jewish - the commercialism got me when I was young - I insisted on getting a tree and decorating it with lights and goofy stuff - but no religious icons. But this was different. Duncan horsing around (sometimes a bit too rough for his grandmother, I feared), Fiona with her artist's eye making adjustments, Matthew hanging more lights around the room. Duncan will not realize how warm this whole scene is until he is eons past it. Maybe they will be his hot tub soaks...

I repack back in my room, completely confident that our flight will take off tomorrow but not so sure we will actually GET to the airport on a frozen I-5. SuperDanBob and his Rav4 are picking us up at 6:00 a.m.

Friday 12/19/08 - Quoth The Raven, "End of Tour!"

I can’t believe I am awake downstairs at 5:00 am. But since Matthew is up and walking around upstairs at 5, so am I… Dan successfully Rav4s us to SeaTac and I-5 is clear. Dan also gives me a great holiday gift they found in Cheyenne - a purse made of ties to match my skirt made of ties! On the flight to Oakland Dan bonds with babies but Matthew and I get exit rows alone.

At Oakland, I print my boarding pass for TOMORROW - AGAIN... We stop in Albany, CA for a great breakfast (with complimentary ants - apparently a rain-associated problem here) and stop at the Primarily A Cappella warehouse in San Rafael unannounced to pick up some inventory we are owed, as the guy working there shares his theories on Bass singers and smoking (it works for them, he says - Hmmmmm).

The Raven Theater in downtown Healdsburg is super cool. The town itself seems like a mini-Aspen upon closer inspection, and the aparetment I share with Richard is lovely. We all nap voraciously, then I waste serious time on lo-fi wifi before finding the true passkey. (Thank you for understanding, fellow geeks!) Sadly, the Healdsburg Soap Company store is closed now - I'd wanted to check it out before soundcheck. It's getting chilly here, but it feels like autumn in the Rockies, and the sunset is gorgeous. Matthew finds a great brewery downtown - the Bear Republic - where we have a great pubbish dinner with what seems to be the REAL folks in this town (not the tourists). We all share a brie/garlic/peppers/apples thing while discussing miniature cows and Richard ’s cattle selling opportunities in Virginia.

One of the coolest things about the Raven is the Wall in the green room upstairs, where we sign our names NEXT TO a 1989 poster for a Bobs show there that has the My I’m Large logo. Tom Brand, the uber-cool theater manager tells us of their uphill battle at the Raven, which has several incarnations. He did an awesome job tonight - there's a healthy, hearty house that's very vocal and fun to play with! This GREAT audience hoots n hollers. We MUST come back here. I find myself mentally drifting during the show... I actively try to "Be Here Now" as our last show for several months becomes a memory, song by song. The Vince Guaraldi tune, our last encore after a stellar WHITE ROOM is the best yet.

After the show, I get more bagel suggestions from former Los Angeles resident, local musician Ken Winett (who'll email me them in great detail later down to the suppliers of several delis), trombone jokes, and longtime fan Bob Meline has Dan and me sign the great old Bobs shirt he brought to the show (see photo, L), completing his collection. Then a righteous dude comes up to the merch table and confuses me by saying he "bought your CD but I feel terrible because I haven’t listened to it yet.” I'm still not sure what I should have said to him... so I say, "Duuuuude... you could have told everyone here how great it is and that they should buy it!" It's a cold walk back to the apartments. I take extra CDs out of the merchandise bag to bring back to LA so Brynne can send them to Alaskan promotoers - our March tour winds up there (wonder who got that ball rolling?!?!). I repack for the millionth time, set the alarm and sigh.

By the way, you can read a review of the Healdsburg show HERE.

Saturday 12/20/08 - If You Lived Here, You'd Be Home By Now

I can’t believe I am downstairs at 6:00am. But this was the LAST 5:40a.m. wakeup of the tour! (I woke up @ 5:39, right before the alarm, of course.) As Matthew and Richard scrape ice off of the windshields with credit cards, Dan and I struggle with consciousness. How come the old guys are wide awake? : ) I open one eye to sunrise over the Richmond Bridge. The next thing I know we’re on Hegenberger, getting gas before we return the car at Oakland Airport. The shuttle drops the guys @ Terminal 1. It’s over.

I SouthWest home next to a cruisebound Idaho couple. It's surreal. At home, I nap, head over to see my Student Nora (I'm a mentor with the Fulfillment Fund) and give her and her family gifts for THEIR upcoming flight to Mexico tomorrow... I rehearse and then sing in a gig for Karen Nash at The Grove (after forgetting to bring the lyrics - I am...losing...brain...cells...every... minute...here) and head home with Alex. And have I mentioned that I'll be teaching vocal master classes in the Santa Cruz Mountains next week? aw....Goomnight already!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR, ALL!

(C)2008 Amy Bob Engelhardt